If it looks like a post, smells like a post, and sounds like a post...

...it probably kinda is one.  Sorta.  I wrote this on my phone's notepad back in April, so things have definitely changed since then, but I still giggled at it a little.  Maybe you will, too.

Anna Beth's to do list:

• Wake up at 3:30 a.m..  Mommy misses me the most at that hour.  She likes for me to be in her bed, not mine.
• Put my feet on Mommy's nose while she sleeps. She likes that.
• Be grouchy when I get up.  Mommy, do you know you snore?
• Throw most of my breakfast on the floor for Tootie. I kinda owe her for something.
• After breakfast, mess with the blinds. Mommy will raise them so I can see outside. When she puts them up, she'll find the dead moth that I was going to take care of. What?!?  I was going to clean up. I'm a giver.
• Find Mommy's last 4 issues of "Southern Living." She hasn't had time to read them, so I will eat them.
• Have an exploding diaper incident that defies laws of physics and gravity. Consider that your science lesson for the day, Mommy.  
• Mommy has to change my outfit because of the diaper thing, so it's a fashion show!  Work it, girl!!!
• Laundry time.  While Mommy folds clothes, I take the folded clothes out of the basket and throw them after I slobber on them.
• Nap, but only after I put up a prize-winning fight.
• Lunchtime. Scream like a demon and hit the spoon every time Mommy tries to feed me vegetable turkey. If it looks like puke in a jar, it probably tastes like it, too. Eat Mommy's sandwich and Cheez-its instead. Winning!
• Spit up on freshly-vacuumed carpet and Mommy's new shirt. Told ya I didn't like vegetable turkey.
• Find half bath door ajar. Play in the big white fountain. Be amazed at how high-pitched Mommy can scream.
• Eat fridge magnets. Open kitchen cabinets. Smash fingers repeatedly. Bump head numerous times.
• Make note to self to get new hobbies.
• Eat Tootie's food. Enjoy impromptu bath and mouth-washing in kitchen sink.
• Pick up Emma and Luke from school.  Try to eat their homework.
• Attack Tootie while she sleeps. Laugh maniacally.
• Look innocent and confused when Daddy gets home and Mommy tells him that she's exhausted from our day. 
• Eat/throw dinner.  Wear as much of it as possible.
• Take a bath. Splash Daddy.  Eat washcloth.
• Pretend to go to sleep by 11:00 p.m.  Get up screaming at 11:30. Ha, ha!!!  I fooled you, Mommy!  I'm not sleepy!  Let's do it all again tomorrow!